Humour & Satire Archive

Chief Minister of Bunjab and Takfiri Deobandi Enforcers – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: In this video, another Good Liberal “anti establishment” Pro Taliban icon, Comrade Shahbaz Sharif evokes the style of Hitler when he pledges to drag the then President Zardari, on the streets of Larkana, Karachi and Lahore. Post by Usman
Return of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Deobandis of Lal Masjid – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji:     Source : Return of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Takfiri Deobandis: “Anyone remembers the notorious Deobandi seminary Jamia Hafsa of Islamabad, affiliated with the Laal Masjid? They are back in the business of kidnapping, torturing and brainwashing innocent
Maj Gen Athar Abbas should have waited longer – by Riaz Malk Al Hajjaji: How shameless of Major General (retired) Athar Abbas to critisize his ex boss just months after Gen Kayani retired! He should have waited longer. I hope there are no such backstabbers amongst the judiciary who start slamming their former
Moderate Syrian Rebel Application Form – The New Yorker: WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) — After announcing, on Thursday 26 June 2014, that it would seek $500 million to help “train and equip appropriately vetted elements of the moderate Syrian armed opposition,” the White House today posted the following
Arsalan Iftikhar, Tahir ul Qadri and Noora Democracy – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: Congratulations to Honda Civic Society (aka civil society) and Sipah-e-Sahaba (aka ASWJ-LeJ) in their joint struggle to restore Grade 22 bureaucrat PCO Judge Iftikhar Muhammad Chaudhary. The Liars, ooops, Lawyers movement has finally borne fruit! “Doctor” Arsalan Ibne Iftikhar,
Hajjaji’s tribute to Benazir Bhutto – by Riaz Malik al-Hajjaji: Once was a Hommie named Zia. He was a badass Mujahid. His Bro was General Akhtar and his Ho was Farhat Hashmi He pimped his reign with dollars and make the country crack In stepped Pinkie to take it
British Sunnis declare Jihad against Shia PM David Cameron – by Riaz Malik al Hajjaji: (Inspired by the false Sunni-Shia discourse used by BBC, CNN and other Western media to obfuscate and justify the Saudi-Qatari backed Salafi-Wahabi and Deobandi terrorism in Iraq and elsewhere) The “sectarian” Government of David Cameron and Queen Elizabeth has
Condolences to Nawaz Sharif and other TTP-ASWJ apologists on Zarb-e-Azb – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: Condolences to the “anti-establishment” Comrade Nawaz Sharif on the launch of operation against the Taliban in North Waziristan. Condolences to pro-TTP-ASWJ journalists including Hamid Mir, Saleem Safi, Irfan Siddiqi and Ansar Abbasi of Geo TV/Jang Group. Condolences to Hazrat
Let’s blame Iran for the current mess in Iraq – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: Just few months ago, some Good Liberals of Pakistan were actively supporting ISIS militants in Iraq and Syria – back then, we knew them by their former avatar which was Free Syrian Army (FSA). What happened to FSA? Clearly
Tracking ISIS from Syria to Iraq: An analysis – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: Caution: Graphic content While these pictures and the video would have made my ancestor, Hajjaj Bin Yousuf, quite happy, even I sort of wimped out towards completing it. Basically, this story starts in Homs, Syria, where as per SoS
Klingons attacked Karachi Airport – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: My Take on this is that: 1.Attack on Small Town Karachi airport is good for Lahore as it might divert traffic there. This is not based on reasoned analysis, of which I Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji as a season patriot hypernationalist
Chaudhary Nisar cuddling up to the Taliban – by Bi-Ghairat supportor of PML N & PTI: This is a picture of Pakistan’s current Interior Minister, Chaudhary Nisar Ali Khan’s friendly handshake with Muawiya Tariq, a high ranking leader of the banned ASWJ-LeJ. ASWJ-LeJ is the main partner of the Deobandi Taliban in Pakistan. The Wigged Chaudhary
Top 10 comments about this picture: 1. Where is a Drone where you need it? 2. Hamid Gul ISI linking the Salafi (Hafiz Saeed) and Deobandi (Sammy the mullah sandwich) Terror ideologues. 3. Gasp, where is the Deodarant when you need it. 4. Yeh, we
Cost of Supporting “Strategic Death” Takfiri Deobandi militias like #ASWJ #TTP – by Qurat UlAin H Zaidi: I don’t care if #LatifJohar is on huger strike till death. Yeah I know he’s not eating anything from 35 days. it’s his choice after all. To hell with those people who are demanding their rights by indulging in
So an Atheist, a Muslim and an Ahmadi walked into a bar one day – by Shamila Ghyas: This may or may not be based on actual facts…. and it won’t make much sense to most any way. Key: At – Atheist Ah – Ahmadi M- Muslim So an atheist, a muslim and an Ahmadi walked into
ہماری اپنی فوج اور ہماری اپنی آئی ایس آئی؟ – از عامر حسینی: یہ ہماری اپنی فوج اور ہماری اپنی فوج ہے بھلا ہم اس کے خلاف بولنے کا تصور کیسے کرسکتے ہیں؟ یہ ہے ٹیپ کا فقرہ جو ہر ٹی وی چینل پر آپ خبر ناموں،ٹاک شوز کے دوران خبریں پڑھنے
Condolences to Pro Talibans on Afghan Election Turnout: A Facebook discussion: Editor’s note: We are posting here a discussion between Syed Riaza Malik Al Hajjaji and an urban elite apologist. As expected other than tone and the quality of written english the urban elite taliban apologist had no substantial argument.
Condolences to Pro Talibans on Afghan Election Turnout- by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji:   My deepest condolences on the record turnout in the ongoing Afghan Elections. We really wanted to believe that Afghanistan is still our backyard, our “Strategic Death”, oooops, “Depth”. But it turns out that the Taliban are really not
منٹو- لوحِ جہاں پہ حرفِ مکرّر نہیں ہُوں میں: منٹو کا گھر بک گیا ، اور اب یہاں نئی تعمیرات ہونگی، وہ جگہ جو کسی اور قوم کے لئے ایک اثاثہ ہوتی ناپید ہو جائے گی. خیر یہ تو ہونا ہی تھا، ہمارا معاشرہ تخلیق ، فن اوراظہار کا
مذہبی تعصب سے دور ﺍﯾﮏ ﻋﺎﻡ ﭘﺎﮐﺴﺘﺎﻧﯽ ﺳﮯ ﻣﮑﺎﻟﻤﮧ – از عامر: ﺳﻮﺍﻝ : ﮈﺍﮐﭩﺮ ﻋﺒﺪﺍﻟﺴﻼﻡ .. ؟ ﺟﻮﺍﺏ : ﺍﯾﮏ ﻗﺎﺩﯾﺎﻧﯽ، ﺟﺲ ﻧﮯ ﭘﯿﺴﻮﮞ ﺳﮯ ﻧﻮﺑﻞ ﺍﻧﻌﺎﻡ ﺧﺮﯾﺪﺍ ﺳﻮﺍﻝ : ﻣﻼﻟﮧ … ؟ ﺟﻮﺍﺏ : ﺍﯾﮏ16 ﺳﺎﻟﮧ ﻟﮍﮐﯽ ﮐﺎ ﺍﻣﺮﯾﮑﯽ ﮈﺭﺍﻣﮧ، ﺑﮭﻼ 16 ﺳﺎﻝ ﮐﯽ ﻋﻤﺮ ﻣﯿﮟ ﮐﻮﺋﯽ ﺍﯾﺴﯽ ﻣﻠﺤﺪﺍﻧﮧ
“Shair Aur Bukree Aik He Ghaat Par. He must be in Punjab” – says CM Shahbaz Sharif:  
Valentine’s day: Top 10 reasons why cupid should be jailed in naya roshan Pakistan – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji:   Cupid should be in the Taliban section of a KP jail, he will be freed soon. Cupid should switch from Baloch BLA to Deobandi ASWJ/SSP and he will be free soon. Cupid is a “dollar slave” not a
“The Taliban are coming”, sings this young boy from a Deobandi madrassa in Punjab – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: “The Taliban are coming, the Taliban are coming”, sings this young boy from a Deobandi madrassa in Daska, a small town, less than 100 Kilometers from Lahore, Punjab. The tone is triumphalist with explicit warnings to Sunni Barelvis, Shias,
Dial “D” for Deobandi – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: In his most recent interview, we have reached a curious moment when Zaid Hamid is more explicit and clear in his condemnation of the Taliban than our Good Liberals. Actually, when Sunni Barelvis like Zaid Hamid and Sahibzada Hamid
نظم: ملا کا ایجنڈا – شاعر سلمان حیدر:
I protest the unfair US sanctions on Malik Ishaq Deobandi and LeJ – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: On behalf of all pro-Taliban Deobandis and pro-establishment good liberals, I protest the unfair US sanctions on Malik Ishaq Deobandi and the LeJ. But our Deobandi Mujahideen are already five steps ahead of the US Terrorist Banning Committee. First,
My salute to Deobandi 4 plus 3, all-star team negotiating with the Taliban – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Hajjaji sends his Yazeedi salaam to the Deobandi 4 plus 3, all-star team negotiating with the Taliban. To these lovers of Hazrat Yazeed Bin Muawiya, I hope you are successful in getting Mummy Daddy Burger Insaafians to don Burqa!
I left the US because of their hatred towards Muslim – This is my story – by Kashif Chaudhry:   Everyday I would see hate stickers against Muslims at Harvard Medical School. PHOTO: AFP I was born in 1982, in the beautiful American city of San Jose, California. A proud patriotic Muslim American, my dad would decorate our
سندھ فیسٹیول اور ہو جمالو: کہیں گزرے زمانے کے آثار کا موجود ہونا خوش قسمتی ہے، خصوصا آثار اگر ہزاروں سال پرانے ہوں تو پھر ان کی حفاظت کا قاعدہ تو یہ ہونا چاہئے کہ “لے سانس بھی آہستہ کہ نازک ہے بہت کام
Dialogue with Blackwater? – by Bahadar Ali Khan: In the years 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, in response to every terrorist bomb blast certain religious parties and individuals would say in chorus “No Muslim can do it. This is done by Black Water”. And now committee
Top 10 reasons why Baloch missing persons and mass graves recieved little media attention – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: In the last month, Pious Patriotic Puttar Fauj has dealt a major blow to Iranian Shia Rafidi and Indian RAW agents in Balochistan. In addition to the Jihad against Iranian Shia Rafidi pilgrims bus in Mastung, two mass graves
Taliban Bromance in the Time of Liberal Diarrhea – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Good “Jinnah” Liberals Dig Comrade Sharifa aka Nawaz Sharif and are working hard to portray the Right-wing Pro- Taliban Sipah Sahaba PML N as “anti-establishment”. Good “Jinnah” Liberals ditched the PPP after it looked like it was going to
Asma and Bilawal are obsessed with dollars while Hazrat Imran Khan only accepts Riyal – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Look closely in the eyes of Asma and Bilawal and you will see a potrait of George Washington or Benjamin Franklin. Maybe Jefferson. Asma and Bilawal are obsessed with dollars while Hazrat Imran Khan only accepts Riyals when he
Case Study : Typical Pakistani Facebooki Liberal – by Ale Natiq: Ale Natiq: Not only darpok by name but actually tells the world he is a coward of worst degree. Will blame the victim because it’s easy and risk free (and sometimes fashionable) and strategically ignore or cover up the
دیمک سے مذاکرات – از حسن نثار: پچھلے دنوں ہمارے گھر کے صدر دروازے کو دیمک لگی. دروازہ کیوںکہ تقریباً ڈیڑھ سو سال پرانا تھا اس لئے پریشان ہو کر میں نے دیمک کے ساتھ مزاکرات شروع کردیئے. میں نے “باجی دیمک”.”بھائی جان دیمک”.”انکل دیمک” وغیرہ
I request all Ghairatmands and Good Liberals to unite against Apartheid by one French Connoisseur – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Please, please Celebrate the Union of Good Liberals and Good Ghairatmands (like Maya Khan) who worked together to ban French Bistro in Islamabad Diplomatic Enclave. This act, of taking on Non-Taliban Foreigners based in Islamabad’s Diplomatic enclave, required tremendous
اندھا بانٹے ریوڑیاں اپنے اپنوں کو دے:
بزدل خان کا عالی شان پرٹوکول:
Disneyland Pakistan: The new elite in Pakistan are radical in their thinking – by Ayesha Siddiqa: The magazine, Hello!, has just published a special edition for Pakistan highlighting a list of ‘Hot Hundred’ — profiles of 100 Pakistani icons ranging from brilliant writers, playwrights, novelists, polo players, fashion designers, actors, singers, models and many others. The
Aitchison College disowns Ch Nisar, Imran – by Kunwar Khuldune Shahid:   —Principal calls emergency meeting following statements on Qadir Mulla –Fears college would directly be held responsible for producing Nisar, Khan Lahore – Our Education Correspondent: Aitchison College, one of Pakistan’s topmost education institutions, has decided to remove the