“Security is Not the business of the State!” – by Syed Riaz Malik Hajjaji

Happy Two Nation Deobandi Dangerous Duffer Alliance Day. May the God of Caliph Yazeed Bin Muawiya protect the Pakistani Establishment – Generals, Judges, Jihadis and Journalists along with “Anti-Establishment” PML N and PML N:B-Team previously known as the PPP.

March 23, 2015 is the Day we celebrate the Dangerous Duffer Deobandi alliance. This alliance was created in 1948 and since then, Pakistani has lost not just half of its physical terroritary, it has also gained Strategic Depth – in the form of the Taliban takeover of vast areas of present day Pakistan.

Greatest felicitations to Deobandi madrassa network and its shinning terrorists, ooops, stars and the sections of Sunni (Mufti Muneed ur Rehman) and Shia (Sajid Naqvi) collaborators who recently lent their token voice to prevent ANY action against the Deobandi madrassa network that brought you 70,000 funerals.

 

Illustration by Zahoor

Illustration by Zahoor

 

For the rest of Pakistan.

You are free to hide in your houses, free to hide in your cars. Because Security is NOT the responsibility of the State. In time, Sunnis, Shias, Christians, Ahmadis and Hindus will cease to Exist here. Not just in the ideological sense but in the very real sense.

Today, you are all Deobandi Al-Bakistanis.

If you show Unity, Faith and Discipline in the vision of Two Nation Theory founder – who else but my Daddy Hajjaji Bin Yousuf – You are well well on your way to the Totalitarian Fascism that was Afghanistan 1996-2001, Mosul 2014-Present and Nigeria under Boko Haram.

When those who ask me if Al Bakistan will be a secular or theocratic State, I tell you Pakistan will not be ruled by Priests with a Divine mission – just semi-literate Deobandi Qaris with AK-47s.

Don’t teach us Democracy. We learnt Democracy 1400 years ago when Caliph Yazeed bin Muawiya massacred the Prophet’s family to establish Ommayad Dynasty.

Pakistan will be based on the Golden principles of Salafism – as dictated by Medieval polemicists like Ibne Taymiyah, Shah Walliullah, Abdul Wahab, Ashraf Thanvi, Nanotvi and Sirhindi”.  –Hajjaji riffing on Jinnah

 

Hajjaji’s take on Shakespeare’s Julius Caeser

Bakistanis, Jamaatis and Sahabas, lend me your Burqas!

I come to bury Non-Believers, not live in peace with them.

Hajjaji’s Re-write of the Gettysburg Address By Abraham Lincoln

On this glorious day, four-score and seven years ago, my Sugar Daddies decided to hijack the discourse and re-dedicate it to the proposition that all MEN are Not Created Equal. And that Women are best kept Indoors.

that we here highly resolve that these dead Shall have died in vain and that it is Biddah to remember then unless of course its OBL. —that this nation, under Allah, shall have a new birth of Fascism—and that government of the Generals, by the Judiciary, for billionaire politicians, shall perish its neighbours from this Earth.

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