A Pakistani political dictionary – by Naseer Ahmed

Asif Ali Zardari.
A re-incarnation of devil himself because the illiterate, infidel and impious people of Pakistan have elected him as their president.

A place whose oil and gas is more important than its people. It is also famous for its shura for promotion of destruction and prohibition of common sense.

A tool for prediction of dismissal of democratic government by Taliban loving media prostitutes.

Dr. Shaid Masood.
Indecency, immorality, disinformation and worthlessness.

A graveyard where fiscal wisdom is buried every day.

Farooq Leghari.
A famous brother who did what brothers do.

Gulam Ishaq Khan.
My name is bureaucratic treachery and administratative incompetence hate every politician who gets elected.

Imran Khan.
I like western girls because they fill me with Islamic pride in conquest i like western education, I like cricket another western game i like western clubs. I like western models of fund raising. My children are being educated in west.i do not like their mother anymore because she refused to veil herself. But I love Taliban because I view them as an extension my big ego.

General Hamid Gul.
When they killed Hussein (may god bless him) they made a big mistake. They did not kill his son zain ul abdin (may god bless him). Look, I fathered Taliban, they kill everybody.
They killed women and children, they killed men and animals and almost every living thing. They helped in killing Masoud, Benazir, and ahd karzai. They will kill all of you. What a proud father I am.

A place where they show porn –videos to young boys in order to make our land a miserable hell.

Kashaf Abbassi.
A local bitch with international ambitions.

A province where good king harun Rashid rules without providing food, shelter and

Our emperor loves publicity but hates philosophy. Our lion king does not sleep. Even though public want him to. This is the only way they can save them from his virtues. But he does not sleep.

Muttahidda Qomi Movement.
A bunch of criminals who view them as saviors of middle classes.

Pakistan Army.
Ye, people of Pakistan do not dream democracy. I will not let it happen until I live.

Q –League.
I have got Bollywood villain and Hollywood actresses as my reputable members.
I have got Mushahid Hussein who never spoke truth. I have got Shujaet Hussein
who you cannot accuse of lying because you do not understand what he says.
I have got tyrant’s nieces to lie on my behalf.

Talat Hussein.
An anchor that is good at lap dancing, leapfrogging and lying without any remorse.

I love to drink blood, eat flesh and grow hair. Imran Khan and Munawar Hassan love me, because I destroy. HAmid gul loves me because I hate jews, Hindus, Christians,women, children and off course Muslims. I will impose my will upon every creature of Almighty violently because I enjoying raping every good thing in life.

Rehman malik.
I love public statements.

Shaukat Aziz.
I have brought loads of dollars from Pakistan to America.am I not a good employee?

A place where Taliban, shahid masooud, kashif abbasi, harun Rashid have never been. They hate this place because they think it enlightens.

A thing which establishment tries to suppress but it comes back to haunt them.

Wasim Akram.
A better bowler than imran khan. Imran khan regrets why did he include him in team.

An official organization run by an ox from pothohar.he has attacked this organization with his horns. There would be no wapda soon.
X pm.our country has got more than its share of this commodity.

Nawaz Sharif.
I have neither said nor did an intelligent thing in life but I managed to become prime minister of Pakistan twice. I am also waiting for my third term . see, how far you Can get, if you are exceptionally stupid.

Omer Mullah.
My self-centric ignorance has brought my fall.

Yousaf Raza Gilani.
David frost please do not speak fluently. I have got serious learning difficulties.
Zardari bhai, I am loyal as long as you preserve my interests. Nawaz bhai, please do something for prime minister’s power. I do not have courage to speak up.

A darkness which extinguished light.a filthy odour which overpowered every perfume.
A maniac hypocracy which assassinated honesty.



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  1. Abdul Nishapuri