Humour & Satire Archive

What happens when women find a man too handsome? – by A Z: Having no such personal experience, I had no clue up to a few days ago but now I know that, at least, he is deported from Saudi Arabia. So if you thought that there’s no flip side to being
٦٢- ٦٣ اور صادق الامین –٢: پرانی کہاوت ہے کہ نچلے درجے کی ذہانت رکھنے والےشخصیات پر بات کرتے ہیں، اوسط درجے کے لوگ واقعات پر اور  اعلیٰ درجے کے لوگ نظریات پر. اسکول میں یہ کہاوت سننے کے بعد ایک عرصے تک ہم اور ہمارے ساتھی ہیڈ ماسٹر صاحب اور
جنرل پرویز مشرف المعروف خلیل خان فاختہ اڑانا بھول گئے:  جنرل (ر)پرویز مشرف اسلام آباد ہائی کورٹ کے ایک حکم پر ججز نظر بندی کیس میں ضمانت منسوخ کرانے کےبعد اب اپنے ہی گھر میں قیدی بن گئے ہیں-ان کے قیدی بن جانے پر کسی کو بھی افسوس نہیں
Lal Masjid fan club – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Someone please forward a copy of this to His Holiness Highness Hazrat Iftikhar Chaudhary (HHHHIC) aka Abu Arsalan. HHHHIC and his Chacha Supremes must be so proud of reading this as they have always shown a soft corner for
اور کمانڈو فرار ہوگیا – از حق گو: چند ہی سال پہلے کی بات ہے کہ پاکستان پہ ایک فوجی کمانڈو حکومت کرتا تھا، جو اس ملک کے سیاہ و سفید کا ملک تھا ، اس کی مرضی کے بغیر پاکستان میں پتہ ہلنے کا تصور بھی
٦٢- ٦٣ اور صادق الامین – ١: مداری، جادوگر، یا سرکس میں تماشے دکھانے والے، ان سب کے لئے یہ ضروری ہوتا ہے کہ نت نئے تماشے بناتے رہیں ورنہ خدشہ یہ رہتا ہے کہ دیکھنے والے وہی پرانے تماشے روز دیکھ دیکھ کر بور ہو
کہانی ، طالبان سے مذاکرات کی – زالان: کہانی ، طالبان سے مذاکرات کی زالان Twitter: zalaan1 ہر دھماکے اور قتل و غارت کے بعد عوام میں طالبان کے خلاف کروائی کرنے کا مطالبہ زور پکڑتا جا رہا تھا مگر میڈیا میں بیٹھے طالبان کے حمایتیوں ،سابقہ
Ethan Casey all praise to you for protecting the killers, ASWJ-LEJ-TTP, by not naming them – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji:   I must commend Good Liberal Ethan Casey for not mentioned ASWJ-LeJ-TTP even once in his article on Pakistani Christains. As for muslims in America, everyone knows how fearful they are of their lives there. In New York City
Badami Bagh is a conspiracy to defame GHQ assets – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: I think this entire incident has been manufactured by the RAW-Illuminati-Masonic Lodhis (desi version of Masonic Lodge) to defame our strategic assets like ASWJ-LeJ. ASWJ-LeJ and Jaish Mohammad are sister organizations and subsidiaries of our Good Taliban and Good
اچھے ماموں ، برے ماموں: زمانہ گزرا، ہمارے ایک رشتے دار ہوتے تھے جن کو اچھے میاں بلایا جاتا تھا، اصل نام خدا جانے کیا تھا، ہم ان کو اچھے ماموں کہا کرتے تھے کہ ہم سے یہی کہا گیا تھا، وقت نے نہ جانے
Like Sana Saleem, let’s deflect attention from ASWJ-LeJ by blaming Abbas Town attack on Sharmila Farooqi Bhutto – by Riaz Malik Al Hajjaji: I want to take this opportunity to thank renowned liberal blogger and human rights activist Sana Saleem and her Good Liberal friends for their tireless activism for the Lashkar-e-Jhangvi (LeJ aka ASWJ) and their parents in GHQ (Pakistan army). 
Good Liberals and Good Taliban Stand United with Pakistan Army – by Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Related post: Where Hamid Mir and Ejaz Haider converge: Politicians, not army, responsible for #ShiaGenocide It makes my Hujjaji Syed blood boil whenever I see liberal fascist LUBP criticize Good “European” Liberals like Ejaz Haider for his advocacy of
Where Hamid Mir and Ejaz Haider converge: Politicians, not army, responsible for #ShiaGenocide: Related post: Good Liberals and Good Taliban of Pakistan stand united with Pak Fauj – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji In his long apologia for Pakistan army’s inaction against Takfiri Deobandi terrorists of ASWJ-LeJ (formerly known as Sipah-e-Sahaba), Ejaz
Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji condemns LUBP for challenging Najam Sethi’s obfuscation of #ShiaGenocide: Everyone knows that the situation in Pakistan is due to an Iran proxy war between the verses of Hafiz and Saadi. It is a war between Hazara and Pashtun female students who want us to cry about them while
I condemn LUBP fascists’ campaign against good “liberals” – by Syed Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: I condemn this article by LUBP fascists who are out to defame the Pro Taliban Liberals of Pakistan. http://lubpak.com/archives/243673 Shame on LUBP! Good Pakistani Liberals will never defame Sipah Sahaba Taliban. Good Pakistani Liberals will always stand with Hazrat
پسند اپنی اپنی نصیب اپنا اپنا: کہتے ہیں کہ جب پیٹ بھرا ہو تو ہری ہری  سوجھتی ہے، اس کا ثبوت یہ بھی ہے کہ ہر تہذیب نے اوج تب ہی حاصل کیا جب خود کفالت کی منزل تک آ  پنہچی اور اس کے بعد
Maulana “The Moderate” Tahir Ashrafi’s intellectual stand against Zionist website LUBP – by Riaz Al-Malik Hajjaji: Dear Ghairatmands, I applaud the move by my moderate Maulana and intellectual stud, Tahir Ashrafi, for criticizing liberal fascist Zionist Indian website LUBP (www.lubpak.com). Upset by a “fake video” posted on LUBP, attributed to holy Jihadist warriors of Sipah
Blasphemy of Chief Qazi Abu Arsalan by Bilawal – by Riaz Malik Al Hujjaji: Today has been a very upsetting day for me. For days, PTI Sipah Sahaba Taliban supporters like me were hoping that Bilawal’s Urdu accent would suck so that we can then crack jokes on this for the next three
Of good liberals and good Taliban: A response to Feisal Naqvi and Najam Sethi – by Riaz Bin Al-Malik Hujjaji: After reading the latest editions of The Express Tribune and The Friday Times – especially those written by Good Liberals like Feisal Naqvi’s “There Will Be Blood” and Najam Sethi’s current The Friday Times editorial “Terrorism and National Consensus”,
Jamaat-e-Islami lion Munawar Hassan lives to fight another day – by Riaz Malik Hujjaji: Hail to the Chief! Boo Yaaahhh!!! to all the liberal fascist “liberal scum” out there. Prepare to be dazzled by the brilliant arguements of one of the leading lights of Ghairat, Syed Munawar Hassan. In his interview with Shahzeb Khanzada 
عامر خان اور طارق جمیل کی ملاقات: تحریر: زالان چلو مولانا طارق جمیل کی دعائیں رنگ لائیں اور آخر کار ایک عظیم اداکار کی دوسرے عظیم اداکار سے ملاقات ہو ہی گئی ، پہلی ملاقات میں ہونے والی گفتگو مولانا طارق جمیل : الله کا فضل
The Ghairat is Sufficient for Adil Najam – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Related articles: Jamia Salafia Deobandia LUMS fires Dr. Pervez Hoodbhoy Dr. Pervez Hoodbhoy’s letter to LUMS VC Adil Najam “Verily we have brainwashed Mummy-Daddy crowd into Ghairatmands so that they may appreciate Mullah Omar.  For Truly, there is nothing
Urgently required: Holocaust deniers for obscuring propaganda about Shia genocide in Pakistan – by Riaz Malik Hujjaji: Dear Ghairatmands, We urgently require good quality Holocaust Deniers. The powerful liberal fascist lobby is doing its best to spread propaganda that there is a Shia Genocide going on in Pakistan. Look at this baseless article: Is Shia genocide
زمیں جنبد نہ جنبد گل محمد: گئے زمانے کا ذکر ہے ایک دفعہ لائبریری میں خطبات احمدیہ مل گئی، نایاب کتاب ہے بڑے شوق سے جاری کرائی، لے کر باہر نکل رہے تھے کہ ایک دوست نے پکڑ لیا جو بڑے غور سے کتاب کا
Arsalan Iftikhar’s (probable) supplication for his Chief Justice daddy – by Riaz Malik Hujjaji: LUBP pay aati hai dua bun kay tamana meri Zindagi Abbu ki soorat ho Khudaya meri Dosto aao karo tum bhi dua sub mil kar Chaudhry aur Arsalan ki bahali hojaiy Dear Ghairatmand and those liberal fascist “scum” who
Imran Khan and Sheikh Rashid must not apologize to liberal fascists – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Many a times when I read statements by Hazrat Imran Khan and other holy leaders of the PTI, it reassures me that PTI will restore the national sport of hockey to its former glory, Jazakallah! Our skills to deflect
God is a weapon—they worship death – A poem by Habib Sulemani: God is a weapon—they worship death – A poem by Habib Sulemani Satan and other evil characters’ve come out of the Holly Scriptures to rule my land as ruthless tyrants! They crush flowers under their boots, deface beauty, hate
Media Exoneration Commission, the JJJ (Journalist, Judiciary, Jernail) – by Ali Taj: More than a third of US population thinks President Obama is a Muslim, about the same number believe that he falsified his birth certificate to get into office. These are obviously malicious lies but no one in the American Administration is
Hujjaji’s wisdom dump: Save the Burmese Ummah, love Kashmir and thank the ban on Shia website: Dear Ghairatmand (honourable) Bakistanis as well as the liberal fascist scum, Please note that Rafzi (Shia) are crying bloody murder these days. They are playing the victim card and wanting us to cry for them.  Don’t they know that we
Do my Islamist brothers wish to destroy the Egyptian Pyramids? – Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Today, my fellow Ummah brothers of Egypt have finally called for Sharia and the destruction of the Pyramids there.   There is news that this is a hoax.  However, for centuries, these pyramids have transformed good pious muslims into idol worshippers and
Nasim Zehra’s resignation: Rind ke rind rahey hath se jannat na gai – by Danial Lakhnavi: Related post: Nasim Zehra’s resignation, a proper class act نیوز چینلز پر ٹاک شوز کی میزبانی کے لئے ٹی وی کیمرے کے سامنے بیٹھنے والے فن کاروں کو کئی طرح کے فرائض انجام دینے ہوتے ہیں، جیسے اٹھارہ کروڑ
Dictator Zardari Gets Slapped by Supreme Guardians of Justice – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: I am sure that Pak Fauj appreciates how Moeed Yusuf, Shuja Nawaz and their colleagues watch out for them in Imperialist Amrika – even more when some of them dilute their mild criticism of army generals by also pointing towards the civilian “kleptocrats”
‘Twitter detritus’ responds to Ejaz Haider and congratulates Triple H – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Dear readers and especially ghariatmand Pious Patriotic Punjabi Puttars (PPPP), Our Lord, Triple H (His Holiness Highness, Hazrat) Chief Justice Chaudhary Iftikhar is being harassed by Rafzi (Shia) and Banya (Hindu) agents: Pakistan’s Chief Justice humiliated by Shia protesters in
Shame on imperialist, liberal fascist servants of USA – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: I don’t have a job! After all, I am not self-made and do not have job in Hazrat Imran Khan foundation. I am not self made and uncompromised like Honourable Justice Asif Saeed Khosa, Hon. Justice Khalil Ramday and
There is no evidence against Hafiz Saeed – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Dedicated to fellow Ghairatmand comrades like Ejaz Haider Yes, there is no evidence against Hafiz Saeed! Move over Gandhi. Martin Luther King, get a life. The real pacifist of our generation is Hazrat Hafiz Saeed. Lashkar-e-Tayba is a fictious
I pity the fool – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Pity the Nation which gives preference to the Constitution and law and NOT to the poetic license of our democratically elected judiciary. Pity the Nation which critisizes the Chief Justice for  recieving an award from an organization of which he
Congratulations on Chilas victory – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: I am writing this post to thank Pakistani media on behalf of my friends of Sipah-e-Sahaba Pakistan (SSP) also known as Ahle Sunnat Wal Jamaat (ASWJ). During this week, SSP-ASWJ has achieved great victories in Chilas and Gilgit and
Ejaz Haider’s brilliant legalistic defense for DPC leader, Hafiz Saeed – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: Whenever oppressed and under-funded Paak Fauj and its supporters like Hazrat Hafiz Saeed are under pressure, comrade Ejaz always comes to their rescue. In May last year, when ISI was really under pressure because they had failed to protect
American Ababeels and Meera Ghani – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: This post is especially for my PTI comrades and for my heroes Samad Khurram, Meera Ghani and Fundy Kasoori. I am appalled to read the pro-drone article (by Pir Zubair Shah) which is an insult to the great articles written by Fundy Kasuri,
Prominent PTI activist Dr. Awab Alvi dreams of attack on Pakistan Parliament, regrets plot foiled – by Riaz Malik Hajjaji: To internet and the silly liberal fascist “scum” that infest it (you know who you are) Brave PTI warrior and the world’s best dentist and blogger, Dr Awab Alvi, recited the following immortal lines on twitter this morning: “Plot